a little thing i like to call "life"

i am feeling strangely positive, and i don't want to go to bed, so i am writing this instead. maybe it's because this day turned out better than planned, i was able to borrow my mom's car, and just being able to drive somewhere was a relief. maybe i am realizing that things are slowly coming together, albeit really slowly.

i am going to take the plunge, in the form a political science class. it will dampen my feet in the political waters, and hopefully tell me whether or not that is something i would like to pursue. really, what better way to fight the system? well, to be honest, i don't want to fight the system, just those that abuse it, and not really the people either, but the ideas that those people stand for. can you fight an idea? i dunno, but i'm gonna sure as hell try.

maybe it's silly, but ever since i was old enough to notice that things were not so good for people in some parts of the world, (which would probably place me around 11 or 12) i felt this overwhelming sense of duty to do something about it. thus far i have done nothing, and at times even forgotten that this was something i felt obliged to do. when i remember, it's like i slap my forehead and go, "duh. oh yeah, about that..." and promptly continue to do nothing while making grand plans in my head which will, in time, be replaced by some hair-brained idea like, "i think i'll make that really good veggie lasagna tomorrow."

so, in attempting to break routine, i am making no plans, but keeping that idea in the front of my mind, and hope that some brilliant action, (rather than plan) comes along and drags me into that destiny, or fate, or thing i like to call "life".

so next summer, something will happen. i will go visit ohio, or not. i will go do something excellent, or not. maybe i will make that lasagna, cuz i still haven't done that either. the point is, when these two semesters are over, i'll be leaving arizona... i think.